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Do dads get depressed after divorce?

When it comes to the emotional and psychological impact of divorce on people, much of the attention is focused on mothers. Of course, women have many valid reasons to suffer psychologically after a divorce. However, the same applies to dads in Texas and elsewhere. After a divorce, society expects you to be stoic and strong, even when inside you feel as if you are falling apart.

Post-divorce depression can affect men more than most people think, according to Fatherly. In fact, recent studies suggest that divorced men are more likely to commit suicide than divorced women, as well as fail to take care of their health and die of health conditions that are preventable and treatable. Divorced fathers are also more prone to drinking, smoking and engaging in riskier activities than divorced mothers. Loneliness might be a major cause for your feelings of depression, anxiety, hopelessness and anger after your divorce. You might mourn the loss of a partner, but even more, you could miss the time you spend with your children.

How do you recognize emotional and psychological abuse?

It’s easy to recognize domestic violence when the abuse is physical. If your spouse has ever harmed you or your children, you know that he or she is abusive. It can be hard to leave an abuser, whether the abuse is physical or emotional. However, it may be even more difficult for Texas residents to recognize the latter type of abuse.

Psychological and emotional abuse is often subtle, explains PsychCentral. The goal of an emotional abuser is much the same as a physical one – your abuser uses tactics to intimidate and control you. The following signs are common behaviors of emotional and psychological abusers:

  • Making threats or ultimatums to keep you afraid of what might happen if you defy him or her
  • Periodically using gifts and positive behavior to emotionally manipulate you into second-guessing your instincts
  • Giving the silent treatment or withholding affection
  • Having no respect for your privacy regarding social media, test messages, voicemail and emails
  • Damaging your personal property, especially items that mean a lot to you
  • Blaming you for everything and taking no responsibility or apologizing
  • Isolating you from your family and friends and controlling your resources

What is a Disneyland dad?

Like any father in Texas, you want to have fun and make memories with your children when it’s your turn to have them over. Your visitation plans might include taking them out to eat, a night at the movies and maybe even a trip to a theme park. Unfortunately, after one particularly fun visit, your ex called you a Disneyland dad. What exactly does this term mean, and why is it demeaning?

As the National Center for Fathering Explains, “Disneyland dad” is a disparaging term given to fathers who are accused of lavishing gifts and fun times on their children instead of spending quality time with them. The description is meant for dads who are only interested in the good times and not the responsible part of parenting. The label can apply to mothers as well as fathers, but more often involves dads, since men usually have less parenting time with their children.

Can I file for a divorce if I’m deployed?

As we’ve discussed in previous posts, marriage can be challenging when one or both spouses are enrolled in the military. Even strong marriages have their rocky points, but a military marriage can be torture if you or your spouse are no longer happy. What if you are deployed when you realize you want a divorce? You and other Texans in this situation will understandably want answers.

FindLaw explains that servicemembers are usually protected from divorce proceedings when they are deployed. This means that if your spouse files for divorce while you are overseas, you generally would not have to worry about child custody or property division issues being decided in your absence. The Servicemembers Civil Relief Act mandates this to allow you to focus on your vital responsibilities defending the country. However, this may make it difficult if you are the one who wants to file for divorce while you are deployed.

Understanding jail time for not paying child support

At the Law Offices Of Keith E. Holloway, we understand that child support payments may be a financial burden to many Texans. However, we also know that the consequences for non-payment of child support are serious. In most cases, you might face the loss of your driver’s license and professional licenses, and you could have your wages garnished. However, in some situations, you could go to jail for not paying child support.

As the Attorney General of Texas explains, you would be held in contempt of court for repeatedly and purposefully not following a court order – in this case, your court-ordered child support. This offense may be punishable by a jail sentence of up to six months, as well as a $500 fine for each violation. You might also be required to pay court costs and attorney fees associated with the child support order.

How do children of same-sex parents fare emotionally?

“A child needs both a mother and a father to have the best chance in life.” As a parent in a same-sex marriage, you may have heard this phrase often. Understandably, it can be enough to make you see red. You and your spouse love your children as much as any Texas parent, regardless of your sexual orientation. Despite the hurtful words, or perhaps because of them, you may be interested in finding out how children do when both parents are the same gender.

It may not be a surprise to you, but reassuring nonetheless, to learn that current studies are supporting the notion that children fare equally well in families that have same-gender parents as those in families with a mother and a father. Newsweek reported that the National Health Interview Surveys between 2013 and 2015 – an extensive study involving about 21,000 children across the country – determined the children of same-sex couples fared no worse emotionally or psychologically than kids in more traditional family settings.

What is an inconvenient forum and how may it benefit you?

It goes without saying that change is the only certainty in your life. For instance, you may have obtained a Texas divorce in which you received primary custody of your children. Your employer subsequently may have given you a wonderful promotion that necessitated your moving to another state with your children, and the Texas court gave you permission to do so. Now, several years later, your ex-spouse, who still lives in Texas, wants custody of your children for whatever reason. Do you have to go back to Texas to litigate this new custody issue? Maybe not. Per Section 152.207 of the Texas Family Code, you may be able to avail yourself of the inconvenient forum statute.

As you probably know, the Texas court that granted your divorce retains jurisdiction over all matters relating to your children until they become adults. Consequently, that is the court that usually hears and determines any future custody issues that arise between you and your ex-spouse. However, this court may decline to exercise its jurisdiction if it finds that it has become an inconvenient forum due to your children’s present circumstances and that a court in a different state is a more appropriate forum in which to resolve the issue.

Understanding a paternity suit

At the Law Offices of Keith E. Holloway in Texas, we know how distressed you can become when you have children, but their mother not only refuses to let you see them, but also to admit that you are their father. Unfortunately, when it comes to parenthood, biology really is destiny, and you must be proactive in establishing your paternity.

Obviously your children’s birth mother is also their biological and therefore legal mother. However, as FindLaw explains, if you and she were not married at the time they were born, Texas law makes no presumption that you are their legal father. In fact, just the opposite. Per Texas law, your children have no legal father. Consequently, since your children’s mother refuses to recognize you as their father, you must file a paternity suit in court and ask the judge to declare you their legal father.

When can you get an annulment instead of a divorce?

There are some things in life you wish had never happened. The haircut you had in your senior pictures, your horrible first job – even the marriage you now feel trapped in. Like many Texas residents with less-than-ideal marriages, you might feel like your only option is to seek a divorce. However, in some cases, couples may have their marriage annulled. The rules for annulments are limited, however, so it is important to understand how this area of family law operates.

FindLaw explains that an annulment dissolves a marriage as if it had never existed. If your marriage is annulled, it does not show up in court records. Annulments are preferable to some people who belong to religions that discourage divorce, and they can give a sense of relief to those who wish the marriage had never happened. To get your marriage annulled, you would need to meet one of the following conditions:

  • You or your spouse was under the age of 14 or 18 when the wedding occurred.
  • Your spouse is a blood relative – such as a cousin or even more closely related.
  • You discovered your spouse was still legally married to another person – also known as bigamy – when you married him or her.
  • You were under the influence of alcohol or drugs, placed under duress or fraudulently deceived into the marriage.
  • You or your spouse were mentally incapable of consenting to the marriage.
  • Your spouse knowingly concealed impotence from you.

The drawbacks of sole and joint custody

Texan parents have two primary options to choose from when they're divorcing and dealing with matters of child custody. One option is called sole custody, in which one parent is the primary custodian. The other is joint custody, in which the primary care position is shared. Each have their own unique benefits and drawbacks. Today, we'll take a look at the drawbacks.

Findlaw describes joint custody situations as ones in which both of the parents have an equal share of responsibility over raising their child. This means both parents have a say in things like the child's religion, medical choices, schooling choices, and more. The major drawback to this is that there are some situations where joint custody simply isn't a feasible option. If one parent is in the military or jail, they won't be present. Additionally, situations in which one parent had a history of abuse or neglect eliminates this option.

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